:: be still and go ::: Goodbyes

Showing posts with label Goodbyes. Show all posts

December 1, 2015

"grandpa" jim

well "grandpa" jim,

words are hard right now, but i want you to know that you are missed. with every bit of my being. with all of my heart.

i hear your laugh and see your big grin in my mind throughout the day and i can't help but smile. but then my heart sinks because you're gone and i can't pick up the phone to call you. i won't see your name pop up on my phone after anymore carolina losses or wolfpack wins.

you've only been gone a week, but my heart misses you in the biggest of ways. you were one of my best fans. you stood in my corner. you prayed for me. you teased me. and you cheered me on in each new adventure. you loved me well with that big 'ol heart of yours. you told the best stories and i loved the way you paused to make sure everyone was listening for the punch line even though we'd heard the story a hundred times. you were joy, delight, grace, kindness, welcome, belonging, gentleness, honesty, integrity, and love in human form. you made your little piece of this earth a better place and your presence is so very missed.

i know where you are now and i know all the things to say to make myself feel better about you being gone, but frankly it still sucks. it just hurts. i want one more hug and kiss from you. it was all so sudden. i didn't get a chance to say goodbye. i didn't know my birthday was the last time we'd be together. if so, i would've kept you there for a just a few more stories and laughs.

what i want is for you to whip open your jacket with your big goofy grin to reveal a wolfpack pin or the trusty red gel pen you always kept in your pocket. i want you to thank me for my "missionary work" at UNC. no one teased me quite as lovingly as you and my sundays in asheville just won't be the same without you there. on that note, i think you'd be proud of me for not yelling "go heels" during your memorial service on sunday. i mustered every bit of self-control i could and managed to sit quietly amidst all the wolfpack talk.

all that to say, i'll be okay. it's just going to hurt (a lot) for a while because of how much you meant to me. i dared to love deeply and as a result i'm going to hurt deeply. it was worth it, but that doesn't make it any easier. a friend of mine posted this phrase recently and it is oh so true...

sometimes memories sneak out of my eyes and roll down my cheeks

i love you "grandpa" jim and i'll see you again one day. until then, i'll do my best to make you proud and cheer my tar heels on to more victories than your wolfpack.

bekah

live unashamedly :: laugh uncontrollably :: love unconditionally

August 4, 2011

where my heart is (part two)

as promised, there will be lots of pictures on today's post. yesterday, i filled you in on my time at kamp. today is all about my day with the Boone girls and two other special friends.

it all started sunday night when i showed up at casa de Boones and surprised LB, the youngest Boone. shrieking, dancing, jumping, screaming, and all out celebrating took place. cue mushy feelings of knowing how loved and missed i am. next up came surprising Linds (middle Boone). cue spider monkey hug that almost resulted in a football tackle. and last but not least, Mal. homegirl got in late from a wedding and i'm pretty sure thought her eyes were playing tricks on her. SURPRISE!!!! loved it. :)

[for the record, they thought the surprise they were getting was a dog. or some type of electronic awesomeness.]

we basically sat around the kitchen table and in the living room all night gabbing it up like old times. i can't tell you how many nights (and mornings) were spent in that kitchen talking life with Jane and the girls. it felt like i never left. great feeling.

hang time with LB and Linds.

i think i'm loved.

with Mal once she got home.

moving on to monday...the girls and i hit up vista tees for some quality branson tank tops and then headed to springfield. i did lunch with my good friend April and then snagged Andy's with Jenny and little Brody. such a treat. i've missed those women so much!!

after lunch with April. love you so much!!

lunch was delish. can we do that every day?

with Jenny at Andy's. where else would we meet?!

(and yes, my hair is warping because of the extreme heat.)

then, naturally, the girls and i filled our window of time with some shopping at the mall. we found some great deals on jewelry, grabbed cookies and pretzels, and then made the dreaded drive to the airport. boo. i thought about stalling and missing my flight (so did they). it's always hard to say goodbye to the Boone girls. they're like sisters. in fact, the last words i heard before walking through the doors to the airport were, "love you sis!" to which i replied, "love you too!"

ugh. i hate leaving them. we laugh instead of breathing whenever we're together. and we talk life. i love being able to be an influence in their lives. and i pray that it continues to be a positive one.

bekah

live unashamedly :: laugh uncontrollably :: love unconditionally.

April 28, 2011

piece of my heart

the hardest part about leaving branson will be the people. i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again. part of my heart will always be here. these are the people who will rip part of my heart out when i say goodbye and head south. i just don’t wanna go because i don’t wanna leave them. i want to stay and be part of these girls’ lives as they grow and develop. i better have a visitor or two in Tampa. that’s all i have to say.